Things you didn’t know you didn’t know…
Do I need a rehearsal?
A phone-rehearsal, which takes about 40 minutes, is included within my fee. During the call we thoroughly discuss all the ceremony elements, and we schedule this call ideally one or two weeks prior to the big day, when the ceremony and vows are all in place and so that everything is fresh in your mind.
We will cover: where your bouquet will go, how confetti gets distributed, what cue is given to signal the start of the entrance, how you’ll stand and move throughout the ceremony, where I will stand and move throughout the ceremony, tips for remaining calm and grounded when you speak your vows, music preparations and so much more.
The phone rehearsal greatly removes the ‘fear of the unknown’ and I am a very supportive Celebrant who (in a non-obvious way) will expertly guide you through the ceremony on the day itself. There is nothing you can forget or get wrong – I am skilled at shaping how things happen.
I’ve removed the expense of an in-person rehearsal from my fee however, in some cases, an in-person rehearsal at your venue can be very helpful – such as when there are complex entrance cues or multiple young flower-girls or page boys, or if your venue requires intricate logistical planning. The cost is an additional $180 – $200 throughout Tweed, Byron or Gold Coast locations, which covers the additional travel and time engaged. You’ll need to get permission from both the venue and wedding planner to be onsite for our rehearsal, and arrange for your bridal party to also be there, and this takes about one and a half hours to cover all aspects of the ceremony.
Keep numbers to a minimum as otherwise it becomes a social thing, rather than a rehearsal. My method is to take the couple only aside and rehearse everything with you both together, and then separately for your vows. I then rehearse the entrance and exit with you both AND the bridal attendants. This separation keeps things a bit of a surprise from the bridal party so that they are seeing almost everything for the first time on your wedding day. After all, we want them weeping and cheering in the wings, fully moved!
Where do I start with my vows?
These aren’t about saying what you love about the other – the word ‘vow’ means ‘to promise’. A little bit of that is good but think about what you promise.
After saying one legal sentence within your vows, two to three paragraphs is the ideal amount. I’ll ask you to keep your vows private from each other, and send me your draft, or even a brain-storm of ideas, through to me.
I’m going to make sure they match in length and general ‘vibe’ but there is nothing worse than saying text book vows that are exactly the same. I promise that matchy matchy vows lack honesty and authenticity. When vows don’t match, it instantly sounds like the person saying the vows is connected to what they are saying.
I’ll provide brutally honest feedback and adaptations to your vows, that you can take or reject. Or if you’ve sent me a few bits and bobs and aren’t a writer, leave it with me, that is my JAM. When you’re happy with them, I’ll elegantly print them upon cards, ready for your wedding day (for you to read from). No memorisation or ‘regurgitate after me’ required; you can take a moment to breathe if you need, and say your vows in your own time, with your own heartfelt expression. I will tuck your beautiful vow cards in with your Marriage Certificate so you can read them again whenever you like.
When do I decide if I’ll change my name?
You don’t have to decide this by your wedding day. If you’re on the fence or you don’t want to change your name, let me know. I’ll simply announce you as Name and Name as husband/wife/wives/husbands, or the newly-wedded Name and Name. There is no legal timeframe for when you need to decide to change your name. You can opt to do this 3 years later, if the mood strikes you.
Through marriage, you can choose to take your spouse’s surname as your own. You need to apply for your official marriage certificate and use that to update your identity documents, and you then become your new name, but legally you can always be your birth name, as you still have your birth certificate to prove that. Happy to chat to you about this as it can be confusing.
If you wish to have a double-barreled name or anything else, you need to complete a Name Change Certificate.
Should I let guests take photos during the ceremony?
If you don’t have a photographer, gathering the footage and photos from your guests might be vital to you. But if you have a photographer, let them do the job so your guests can immerse themselves in the poignancy of your celebrations! I have a sweet way to let guests know your preferences prior to the ceremony.
Think about whether you’re happy for your photographer to be capturing your day with your guests taking pictures. How many phone snaps do people take only to lose the feeling of the moment?
Is it a tradition to be late to my wedding?
You have a world of people working to the timeline you’ve set for the wedding day, so it’s really thoughtful to consider your guests and wedding suppliers, and arrive on time to prevent tension or nerves, as well as enable everyone to do their best work for you. Plus, you’ll get such great photos if your photographer isn’t rushed!
Should I have confetti?
A basket of loose petals offered around is best. Confetti holders are not necessary – and no one is left holding a confetti cone.
Confetti is fabulous for including all of your guests in your sublime joy of being officially married! Who can stop smiling when they are throwing stuff in the air?
How do I make all these wedding decisions?
Your wedding day is a celebration of all that you are, together. Don’t be swayed from your vision and take some quiet time to make decisions that aren’t clear choices to you. Remember you’re paying everyone to deliver your vision so if something doesn’t feel right, feel the courage to chat about it – whether this be with a guest or a supplier.
Don’t feel like you have to keep things in the ceremony that don’t feel like you – Australia is blessed with remarkable flexibility – there’s only one paragraph that I need to say, and you each need to say – and the rest is optional!
Should I hire a planner?
I recommend you do. If you’re getting married on a private property, it’s essential.
Do I need a wet weather option?
Yes. Make sure you discuss at what point you’ll move from plan A to plan B. If you have a planner, this is something they will coordinate.
Can you marry us overseas?
Yes, if I am available!
I will officiate an Australian legal ceremony that can take place before or after your overseas celebration ceremony. The overseas ceremony will not be a legally valid wedding because we will hold the legal ceremony on Australian soil.
We can create your overseas ceremony with ease whilst you’re home in Australia, and I will travel overseas to deliver it. Some of my travel and accommodation costs would form part of my fee.
How much does a wedding at the Registry Office cost?
This is where the couple and their witnesses travel to the office of Births Deaths and Marriages in their preferred capital city to be married. The cost varies between states, from $500 – $1300.
By hiring a Celebrant (like me!) you get to have a ceremony that I create for you, you have control over, and in a location of your choice.